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September 17, 2009

Changes

Well, we have officially broken up with our OB. Nothing crazy bad happened to prompt the break up. It was more of a "it's not you, it's me scenario". We never ever really felt right there, everything was so rushed and of course clinical. The last straw was at our last visit when she happily announced that they were adding two more doctors to the practice bringing the total up to 7 and that we were welcome to make appointments with any of the doctor's not just her. We took that as a message that she really didn't care either way about us so we decided to make zero appointments with any of the doctor's.

Instead, we have decided to do a home birth with a midwife. We had talked about doing this in the beginning but chickened out by focusing on all the bad that could happen at home and all the good that would be available at the hospital. But the further we went down the OB/hospital path the less control we felt we were having in this whole process. Another big reason for the change is our whole TTC process has been so filled with needles, drugs, doctor's offices and surgeries that we just wanted to take back some of this pregnancy for us. And that's what this decision is, the right one for us. We know that not everyone will agree or understand our decision but we are truly happy and excited about this new direction.

17 comments:

Jackie said...

Congrats on what sounds like the right decision for you and your family!!!

Gayby Rabies said...

That's so wonderful! I think that all too often we're put on a conveyor belt when it comes to doctors and medicine. It takes a lot of guts to say "stop, I want to get off". Kudos to you ladies. How did your OB handle it when you said you were leaving? Does she know you are doing homebirth? Did she try to talk you out of it?

Melissa said...

The sad thing is she didn't care. Which I guess is good because it just reinforced that we made the right decision.

Lisa said...

Super congrats on the break up and the start up with the midwife. I'm definitely not bashing OB's but so far our experience with Mr. Midwife compared to the OB that I really like has been like night and day. Our OB moved into a practice where she is 1 of 10 and encouraged us to meet with the other docs. If that were the case I'd have an appt with each one each month of my pregnancy and never see her again until possibly birth. That's not why I followed her to that practice. I followed her to see her. After watching The Business of Being Born, the idea of a home birth feels so wonderful to me. Mr. Midwife doesn't do them but i love hearing about other people's. I can't wait to hear yours. How's the pregnancy going so far?

Farmer Femme said...

How exciting! I'm sorry things didn't fit with the OB, but I'm a big advocate for homebirth and midwives, so kudos for considering the alternative! You both are such an inspiration. xo

Lizzie said...

That sounds wonderful. Congrats for taking charge and doing it your way.

CD and SP said...

Good for you guys! Here's to a great experience.

Mina said...

Sounds like you made the best decision! I', sure you will find a great midwife who will give you the personal attention you need!

Amy said...

You sound happy! Best of luck on this magical journey!!

tireegal68 said...

What great news! It's a shame there aren't more women at that practice and in the OB world that do that - then maybe they would get the message that this is just not okay with us!
I have always wanted a home birth ( actually a water birth! )but my insurance won't pay for it and I am not sure we can fork out another $4,000 but I definitely want a midwife who can deliver at a hospital birthing suite and get a very assertive doula to help us stick to our plan and keep the controlling doctors out!
I was wondering where you are and if that affects the availibility of a home birth.
Good job for firing that doc!And for doing what is right for you and your baby! You are already great mamas!!!!

Two Moms, Two Monkeys said...

Glad you found what you want. We did the OB route (because I'm too chicken) and I hated having to see one of each, so I took my chances and saw just my Dr. and hoped that come delivery I wouldn't be delivered by a complete stranger! Luckily my Dr. was in on the day I had my twins... either way, wish I had known about other options. Congrats!

She said...

wonderful news! i know you guys will have a great experience! i heard that home births are so much more relaxing.

J and D said...

That is great news!
There has been a lot of attention in the media lately (in Canada) stating that home births have been proven as safe if not SAFER than hospital births.
It's so much more natural... I can't do it becuase I'm high risk but I think it is an amazing option for anyone who can!

sleepy said...

I've been a lurker for a while, but I just wanted to commend you on your decision! I had a hospital birth for my first child (horrible experience) and then turned to homebirth (awesome, amazing, powerful experience!)
Best of luck!

oneofhismoms said...

Good for you. The only annoying thing about my birth and the immediate time after was getting to the hospital and being at the hospital. If I'd done it at home it would have been perfect.

reproducinggenius said...

This is a great decision, and I'm betting you're going to be much happier with your level of care, not to mention the contro you have during your birth experience. Hooray!

motherwilling said...

I'm a bit late, but just wanted to echo the encouragement about your decision to follow your gut in such an important decision. Best of luck for your home birth!