April 2, 2009

In Hiding

I feel so pathetic right now. My boss brought his 3month old into the office for everyone to naturally ooohh and aaah over. I went over and did the polite quick visit and threw in a "beautiful baby" comment and have since high tailed it to the other side of the office where I can't see or hear the baby. A place that is safe from the pregnancy and children discussions that all the moms on the other side are having.

I'm in a phase right now where it is physically and emotionally to difficult to be around babies. I've skirted every opportunity of being in their presence. I notice that I go through these phases. At times I can't get enough of being able to visit and play with other people's babies and other times I can't run away from them fast enough.

Hopefully this ends soon cause I hate making excuses and hiding from people. *sigh*


Anonymous said...

i am a champ at avoiding office babies - i have an escape route planned in both directions when i hear one coming!

it's okay to protect yourself and your emotions, there are always plenty of others around to offer oohs and aahs.

Next in Line said...

I am ohhing and agging over the amazing eggs you are making right now! They are the cutest I have ever seen.

Lisa said...

I am right there with you. The most beautiful baby with rosy cheeks and sparkling blue eyes was cooing at me at the grocery store in the check out line and I couldn't even emotionally engage with her. I know her mother must have thought I was a frigid bitch but I'm just at that same place with you where it's just too painful and too hard because it reminds you of what you don't have. I have TWO baby showers to attend this month. I have no idea how I'm going to get through them. If they weren't dear friends I'd just send a gift and skip it but I can't do that to them.

We'll get there Melissa. I know we will. Sending you much love and hugs and lots of well wishes that this cycle is it for you.

Gayby Rabies said...

I've been avoiding / feigning disinterest in babies for so long, everyone around me must think I hate kids. People are really going to be shocked when I finally do get pregnant.

Unknown said...

You are totally not pathetic. I completely understand where you are coming from.
I think it is perfectly normal and I am confident that it will end soon enough for you. I wish you the bestest of luck.

vee said...

It's a tough place to be. Hugs. Don't be hard on yourself.

jay said...

You're definitely not pathetic. That's a really hard one. xx